Joseph's Choice

This season our Advent reflections have focused on Mary, Mary’s journey from the shock of the Annunciation to the birth in the stable. We’ve pondered what it would be like to be called so suddenly to do such a big thing when you are so young, and what Mary was needing when she went rushing off to her cousin Elizabeth. We’ve sat with the powerful words of Mary’s song, the Magnificat. We’ve imagined the hardship of traveling 70 miles while 9 months pregnant. It’s been a lot about Mary, who has, you could say, a starring role in this whole story.

But today we hear about Joseph’s role, instead. It looks a bit different. In some ways, Joseph gets the short end of the stick in this story – Mary has the visitation from Gabriel, Mary receives the extraordinary request to be the Mother of God, Mary ponders this and says, yes (without ever consulting Joseph). Mary even has all the nice artwork and the apparitions and the Queen of Heaven title. Joseph, on the other hand, simply finds out the news; he doesn’t consent to it. When he learns of it, it’s a fait accompli, and he has to deal with it as he will. 

Joseph’s real purpose in the story itself seems to be to serve as a link between Jesus and the house of David, while still allowing Jesus to be the Son of God. But he’s also a human character, and we can imagine what he felt like. There’s a lovely old English carol called ‘The Cherry Tree Carol,’ with Mary and Joseph together in a cherry orchard. Mary wants some cherries and she asks Joseph to gather some for her:

Then Mary spoke to Joseph,
So meek and so mild,
"Joseph, gather me some cherries
For I am with child...."

Then Joseph flew in anger --
In anger flew he,
"Let the father of thy baby
Gather cherries for thee!"

At this moment Jesus, from the womb, intervenes and commands the tree to bow down so that Mary can pick the cherries herself:

Bow down, O cherry tree!
Bow low down to the ground!"
Then Mary gathered cherries
While Joseph stood around....

Joseph is properly chagrined at this, and apologizes to both Mary and Jesus, but you can understand his response.

Because when he learns the news of Mary’s pregnancy, Joseph has three options:

·      shame her publicly, which could by Law expose her to death by stoning (though probably not in practice at that time)

·      claim the child is his, which would bring dishonor to him and to Mary both. 

·      divorce Mary without publicly naming her as an adulteress, which would hopefully shame the real father into coming forward to marry her.

Joseph resolves on his own to dismiss Mary quietly, a kind thing to do under the circumstances. His dream, however, changes his mind.

It’s important to realize that this is a real sacrifice that Joseph makes – he risks the loss of his honor, in a time and culture where honor mattered a great deal. The loneliness of the Holy Family, traveling alone to Bethlehem far away from their families, shows the consequences of his decision – Joseph seems to be the only one present to help when Mary gives birth, no female relatives around to celebrate and care for Mary and the child. They are on their own.

Our diocesan podcast, Faith to Go, offered a wonderful insight into Joseph’s story. His first instinct to ‘dismiss her quietly’ is a decision to do what is right. He is good and honorable and kind, making the best of a terrible situation without stirring up trouble. But God asks him for more than that, for this radical act of embracing and protecting Mary and this child. And when he chooses that option, Joseph sets aside his own story with all of its difficulties and challenges, and plays a part in the larger story that God is about. It’s a small part, but it’s an essential one. And like other characters of salvation history, he may never know just what it means.

Maybe he sees later that what the angel said was true. But maybe he doesn’t – he’s never mentioned in the gospel stories of Jesus’ adulthood, so perhaps has died by then. He didn’t know who Jesus would become – he didn’t know about the healings and miracles and love, or about the suffering and death, or the resurrection. He certainly didn’t know about the people throughout the ages even to today who would follow Jesus.

What he knew was that his betrothed was pregnant and it wasn’t his; that they were poor; that even with Mary heavily pregnant they would have to travel to Bethlehem like others of their family and clan to satisfy the regime; that when they arrived there they would find no place to stay, would be homeless at the birth; that nearly as soon as the child was born they would be fleeing as refugees to Egypt. It’s a story of hopelessness and sadness for Joseph, not anticipatory joy. His own dreams were being replaced with God’s dream, and he couldn’t understand what God was about.

Yet in that darkness, hearing God’s voice, Joseph acted faithfully, as Mary did. Not denying that his darkness and sadness were true. But believing that God is God even so.

This is where Joseph is a model for us. God calls every one of us to play a part in God’s story. We are understandably caught up in our own stories, our own hopes and fears and daily lives and choices. But God asks us to look beyond all of that, to see the part we can play in the larger production, the salvation and redemption of the world.

Often that part is just to be aware, to keep ourselves open, to listen for God’s voice. But sometimes there comes a specific call too, something that we are being nudged to do – as the host David Tremaine said on the podcast, something that only we can do, and yet that isn’t about us at all. Perhaps it’s something as simple as speaking kindly to a stranger and asking about their day; perhaps it’s as monumental as something that utterly changes the direction of our life. Something inside of us nudges, and keeps nudging. And so we are called.

We can hear this call when we listen – when we attune ourselves to notice, when we lift our heads up from trudging along our paths. It may be a long time coming – we may show up to our prayer times and think we’ve heard nothing in return. But listen for God’s voice anyway – it speaks even so. Like Joseph, like so many of our ancestors in the Bible, God calls us to take steps on a path without knowing the end of it.

So here is my instruction to you over this next week, in this crazy time of year. Listen and be aware:

·      Your loved one may come to you with news you neither expect nor welcome.

·      You may have a dream with a message in it you can hardly believe.

·      You may realize that what the culture around you expects no longer fits your situation.

·      You may find that what you thought was your life is suddenly completely different, that a new thing is being born that will wreck your life and save it all at the same time.

·      You may see the light shining in the darkness – the darkness still there, yes, for now, but not overcoming the light

God is here with us, Emmanuel – in ways we don’t control and don’t expect. Listen. And may God bless us in our struggles to believe.